1. Accept
the fact that you stick out like a sore thumb. If you’re an American like
myself—there’s no way you can get around the fact that when you order a beer,
you can hardly pronounce “cerveza”, and that you don’t cross the street when
the sign is still red like everyone else. I’m not saying it’s a terrible thing
to be a foreigner—it’s all a part of the process and the experience. But
please, don’t fight it. Let the hiccups happen—and try your best to walk away
from awkward miscommunications with locals and other unfortunate mishaps with
your head held high.
2. Get
ready to get lost. Spain (Barcelona in particular) is something of a maze—different
barrios here and there, hidden treasures, hidden street signs…you make one
wrong turn and poof! You’re lost. Take a deep breath—there’s a metro stop every
couple of blocks, you’re bound to get home. In the meantime, take a walk, look
at the architecture, get some gelato. You’re in Spain for crying out loud.
3. Walk
quickly. The Spanish are not a people known for dawdling. If you’re that
obnoxiously oblivious dipstick in the metro that walks as slow as a turtle, you’re
going to piss a couple Spaniards off.
4. People
stare—get over it. Stare right back. It’s a cultural thing.
5. Couples
practically have sex in public. Lips are locked on street corners, in cafes, in
the seat next to you on the train—it’s normal. And while Fabio’s hands are
wandering in places not suitable for PG13 viewing and Lolita is sticking her
tongue in rather unusual locations—don’t stare. This is the one time you keep
to yourself, ‘cause even though the hot and heavy love birds may be close
enough to hear lips smacking, YOU’RE the weird one if you watch. Don’t be a
creepy American.
6. I
hope you have some thigh muscle. Not only does everyone walk everywhere in
Spain, but I guarantee that even if you’re staying in a hostel/hotel, you’re
gonna have some stairs to climb. Eight flights and 64 steps are what separate
the ground floor of my building and my apartment.
7. Don’t
complain. It’s ugly. Don’t be that person that stands around all day whining and
crying over the fact that people eat super late, there’s no toilet paper in the
bathroom, the metro is hot, everything is served with meat, or that water is
more expensive than wine. Get over yourself! You’re here to experience the
culture—so get out of your comfort zone and peel off your preppy, over
pampered, spoiled American skin -- and eat a fricken plate of ham.
8.
8. Everyone’s
going to tell you to eat more. “¡Come más, come más!” Whether you’re with a
host family or visiting a friend of a friend—they want to see you eat yourself
into an absolutely blissful Spanish food coma. Now's not the time to watch your girlish figure. Get used of it—again; it’s a
cultural thing.
9. Don’t
worry too much about your boo back home. I know—you love them, and yes, I know
it’s hard. But trust me—if it’s meant to be- it will be, and your Romeo or
Juliet will be happy to see your newly culturally diverse little face when you
return!
10. When you
sincerely do feel like the whir and rush of the city and Spanish life is too
much and too different for you (honestly, culture shock is real at times)—relax.
Things are different for a reason. Try to look at the logic behind why things
are the way they are, and why people do what they do in this part of the world.
This is a (possibly) once in a lifetime experience—enjoy it.
¡Besos y buena suerte!
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